the gift of the present.

I feel alive. Present. For the first time in quite a while. I have a migraine, and vision in my left eye is blurry. But this is mostly a big nuisance- I still feel this clear feeling. It's a lovely summer evening, 8:25pm, and I've got the front door open, shades up on the window, and have reached out to neighbors I've lived next to for years and haven't officially met. I'm putting myself out there, and am more available than I've been. It is an energy shift. A happy one!

Maybe it's because I'm on the cusp of finally digging into the thing that my life has been waiting for me to do. It's finally time, and I have arrived at the place where I'm ready to move forward, instead of just wondering and thinking about it.

One thought is that there are NO MORE DISTRACTIONS. It's interesting how some of us have to push ourselves to the brinks to launch the change we have been desiring for long periods of time. I have no financial distractions, because I have no money to spend. It's peaceful in a way it hasn't been previously. I know that it is leading to the next step for me. I have no relationship distractions. As I've mentioned in a recent post, my life has been eerily quiet (my cousin, recently visiting from Spain, called Greensboro "Spooksville" Happy!

This is the first time in I don't know how long that I am home at a reasonable hour, no where to rush off to, taking the time making a semi-proper evening meal for myself. I found a bottled spiced apple cider in the fridge, and am making a club sandwich. Seems crazy I'm sure that these things would be remarkable, but most of the time I don't slow down long enough to breathe. I'm appreciating the little things that could be taken for granted, and it's a really nice feeling. The absence of some things makes other things more apparent.

My club sandwich
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Tonight's view from my back steps
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